As you can see, I haven't written anything here for a long time. So long that it almost feels like I might as well start another journal about my recent time in SL. That way people reading this wouldn't be drawing their conclusions about me as I am now
from my early second life. But then, whatever entries came first in the new journal would also skew the perspective until things became more rounded. I've changed my appearance plenty of times, and spent time freebie collecting, dressing up, exploring, photographing, building, making shapes... but the person inside is always the same. I know I haven't arrived at the "final" me, in terms of my look(s) in SL, so there's really nothing monumental to separate this continuing journal with the previous entries, just time.
After being in-world for around 4 months, I've spent maybe another 6 months completely out of second life. Partly because I was spending too much time in SL, and doing related things on the net, but finally because when windlight came in, my computer no longer met the system requirements.
We eventually got a new (relatively fantastic) computer, and I've come back to SL in the last 1-2 months. I wanted to take things slowly. At first, I didn't know if I should say hi to anyone (not that many people that I knew were still around). I had a lot of serious thinking to do about whether I wanted to be back in SL, (and risk spending too much time here again), and even what the "point" was.
Windlight blew me away. Actually, things not being grey blew me away, and windlight was a substantial bonus. It made me realise how badly my old computer had been coping towards the end, when it didn't meet the requirements, but could still technically open the program. SL is a lot more fun when you can see and move around in it ;)
Second life has always appealed to me; I love the variety of avatars, exploring the world, self discovery / self expression, interacting with other people, and seeing and doing things that aren't possible in real life. There is an amazing degree of escapism from real life, while at the same time being in a place that is also real in it's own way. Even during my time without the ability to enter SL, I still kept checking the SL blogs I'd read before.
My inventory was a mess. Probably half of it was pretty poor quality, and 95% of what was in there had nothing to do with "me". I find it hard to delete anything, but I made a serious attempt to pare down my inventory to just the mid and top-quality stuff, and clothes that I would actually wear, etc. There's no point having 30 pairs of jeans to look through when you only wear 3-4 of them.
Also, having a bit more money (in RL) this year has made me feel (a little) less guilty about spending money in SL. I'd originally put some money ($25 I think) in SL so I could bank some (luckily I didn't bank too much of it) of it and get the extremely high interest. For a while there I was earning 70L in interest a day... 'twas great until the bank disappeared. Heh. I still had around 1300L left in my inventory this time around, which I decided to spend in SL rather than bothering to withdraw it into RL somehow. Although I'd already bought a few things in SL, I've found that buying just a few more bits and peices has made me feel more like myself here. Even though I had a lot of freebies from designers that I really liked, the things that were really "me" were few and far between. It's made a suprising difference to have more than a couple of casual things to wear that I've actually chosen for myself. It's opened up a whole new level of experimentation. I still don't want to go overboard... right now I'm tempted by 8 skins for 5000L... but haven't come to terms with spending $25 on one "thing" in SL, especially when I do still like the skins I have. And there are plenty of other things I want too...
I've taken hundreds of pictures in SL since I've been back (and even before I left, when I'd stopped blogging). There's often a bit of a blog-narritive in my head as I take pictures, and I always wonder if I'll eventually post them. What stops me is the tedium of choosing the pictures,and resizing and uploading them. Most of them are nothing special - just "point and shoot" pics with defult atmosphere / lighting settings, and are more to document the experience than to be artistic. I keep taking them because I like looking back through them - they remind me of what I have in my inventory, and of places to go.
Will I start posting pics/blogging again now? I don't really know, and honestly, I don't think I did it that much to begin with. But I am back in SL (feeling a bit shy and unsettled again, even though I've been passed my first rez-day) so I thought I'd make a note of it. Even as I write this, knowing that I've spent all of the last day of the weekend and tonight (Mon) in SL, I think that on some level, being back = being addicted, and I'm not good with SL moderation. So, I don't know how long how long it'll last.
For what it's worth, here are a couple of pics of me, both taken on the last two days. The first was taken today doing the ghost-busters halloween hunt, wearing a dress, necklace and hair from the hunt on my newish faun avatar. The second is standing in Dutch Touch (possibly my fav store) yesterday, having just bought an "editing appearance" tank top from somewhere else (unfortunately only on the undershirt layer, and not finished off nicely at the bottom, but otherwise well made and I love the sentiment :)) . Neither pic is really my "default" avatar, and I selected both pics from tiny thumbnails, so they probably weren't the best photos either. I figured if I got too hung up about that I wouldn't post at all.
I don't see myself wearing this hair or dress again, but I liked their kind of retro look together.
I've had this outfit for a little while, but this is the first time I've worn the skirt and socks for any length of time. I usually wear the jacket with jeans, and even then haven't worn it that much. The necklace was one I found (and edited) from Chakryn Forest. I made the sleeve prims from the sock prims (I wanted sleeve cuffs more than sock cuffs, and the prims were no-copy... so I re-coloured them to match the jacket and did my best to re-work them).